I never liked Lassie
Snowy in Herges Adventures of Tin Tin was pretty cool
was just an idiot
the other hand - Muttley is a hero – now that’s
a dog and a half, and you know what? (Dastardly retired
to the House on the hill)!!
Doo – Juries out on this one as I’m not sure
whether he’s as stupid as Shaggy
Milo – remember him from the film Mask – I’ve
no doubt the men out there remember Cameron Diaz more
than Milo, but Milo and that mask – now that’s
a dog I would love to take out and about – mind
you? If Milo doesn’t want to come out with me then
what about – no forget it – Cameron, nah,
not my type!!!
never liked and still don’t – Marley…..just
got on my nerves, I started to read the book (borrowed)
and the fillings in my teeth leapt out in disgust. And
the film? Unprintable
– Roy Hattersley MP – remember him? He had
a best seller about that dog. A nice anecdote
about Marmaduke? OK so what about him (Was Scooby Doo
loosely based on him)??
Bassett – enduring and has endured and as a Kid
I had a Bassett – Fred Bassett rules
– Timeless – Peanuts was very clever, and
yes I bought a Snoopy toy!! SAD or what?
– The Magic Roundabout and a dog on Magic mushrooms
– I’ve never been the same since I watched
every episode. And Today?? They would never get away with
the double meanings. For its time, that was very clever.
But it took me years to work it out!!!
the mushrooms over here please dearest one”
what about Gnasher?? Dennis the Menace’s pet pooch
- Remember him?? Now there was a dog………if
you saw one of those in the street you’d cross the
road and if he lived next door you’d relocate and
tell the new owners he was a pussy cat!!
The Blue Peter Dogs…………Oh good
grief – Embarrassing
Dr Who’s K9 – he didn’t last long did
he?? I’m not surprised
been old slobber chops with Tom Hanks and the German Shepherd,
K9 with John Belushi………
Dalmatians – Cruella De Ville – now I can
associate with her because of you know who!! No, not Meryl
Streep……oh come on, you know who I mean?
of course there’s Churchill………….Ohhh
Yesh…………..That car insurance company
was smart – How odd – we’re insured
with someone else!!
Spin off’s??? Spotty dogs, Churchill dogs, Snoopy
and blah blah blah
the list goes on and on………..
stage left…………Our Spins!!!
was thinking about the hero’s and zeros like the
above because of Duncan???
ten dogs we feed them in two separate rooms, the kitchen
for the well behaved and sensible and the conservatory
for the……..well how can I put this?? For the
over enthusiastic!! The latter are the dogs who believe
they have not been fed for about 10 hours and are of course
now starving. Duncan falls into this category despite
the fact he is putting on some real weight now he’s
has got into the ‘habit’ of jumping up and
down on his back legs, on the spot like he’s training
for the Para’s or the Marines. And jumps they are
as well – his back feet are 2 feet off the floor,
his head is well above the door frame.
he sees the food coming out he’s suddenly on terra
firma, planted and solid to the floor waiting for his
bowl to go down. Then he’s a pussy cat!!
what category would Hollywood put him in??
know? Dogs in space…….”more mushrooms
me being me I thought it would be a good idea to nominate
our Spins for various starring roles in the movies, the
papers, comics and cartoons
dog or dogs must have traits and personalities that match
our hero’s and zeros or you can see them in a similar
scenario to what you’ve read or seen. Well OK then
I could see ours that way- but then again, I would!!
I also have moved on to the Spin off’s – No…..not
Spin pups!! But the stuffed toys and the picture books
to colour in and the little waggy tale stories. Oh bless
imagine a Spinone nodding dog on the rear shelf of your
were always going to buy a bigger car anyway
Spinone stuffed toy in the pram or baby buggy –
complete with the baby in the shopping basket part underneath
– because the toy is cuter and anyway it takes up
all the room
buy your child a pop-up book with a Spin popping up –
and it knocks the kid off its chair
about the T-Shirts and the sweatshirts?
of a Spin on the kids bedroom wall…….if you
have two or three Spins you need never decorate again-
In fact if you left them in there with a bone each for
five minutes they could add authentic slobber as well…..perfect
I’m now giving away free decorating tips
I’ve forgotten what I started to write about, I’ll
get a cup of tea and come back to this after said refreshment
then, where was I?
I’ve just thought about refreshing drinks with a
- Coke and slobber please, shaken, not stirred
- Lemonade and slobber with ice and lemon
- Café Latte topped with slobber
- Lemon tea with ice and slobber
- And my favourite? Pimms with slobber, cucumber slice,
touch of mint and ice
started a trend – I just know it
then of course there’s the record deal?
Spinone and the Howlettes with their number one hit single
– ‘Slobber me gently’
haven’t you looked at your Spin and thought –
that was a movie moment, wow, I read about this in the
Dandy, or read the cartoon strip in The Daily Ishtlubb
there a cartoon strip in Dogs World??
is it all too serious for that kind of thing??
was actually thinking of going down to our local vets
and asking them if they wanted to use one of Our Spins
for Marketing purposes……..but that was dropped
after The Dearest One told me they would probably put
could imagine the Hollywood Blockbuster “SPINONE
TREK”…..Too boldly go where no Spin has gone
the sequel “RETURN OF THE SPINONE ”
so substitute the wookies for Spins!!!
could just imagine Mr Spock trying to keep calm with one
of them in the cast, or Yoda trying to teach one to sit…….and
hearing Yoda’s immortal line “Try? There is
no try, do or do not”
Vadar would have summed it up better “The force
is strong in this one”
come on think about it? Substitute Lassie with a Spin…….if
I had fallen down the well and was waiting for a Spin
to see my plight and run off to get help
“Bark bark, bark, bark” “What’s
bark, bark, bark” “Oh no – you mean
The Banker has fallen down the well and has hurt his leg
and needs us to go in the 4 wheel drive with a medical
kit and rescue him”?
bark,” “Well let’s go Lassie –
jump in the back”
“Where’s The Banker JJ”?
where is he, come on let’s go and find him”
– come on there’s a good boy – wake
– where did you get that bone from”?
“We’ll never get to the show on time Muttley”
“We have a puncture”
will we do now”?
idea Muttley….I lay down in the middle of the road
and you look as if you’re helping me and the first
car to stop will help us change the wheel”
later - after winning the show Muttley who had got a lift
to the show from the first car that stopped remembered
where The Banker was in the road. Muttley changed the
wheel, dragged The Banker into the back of the car and
Spin in this Scenario?
Stayed asleep in the back of the car and then only woke
up to bark at the roadside recovery man sent out to swap
over the spare wheel……..and didn’t get
to the show
Snoopy was Snoopy………but if a Spin had
bubbles coming out of its head with strange hieroglyphics
in it – then it would have taken that to be just
Scooby Doo – “Heeheeheehee………Dearest
One has Scooby snacks” “And no ghosty beasty
thing stops me from getting a Scooby snack”
“If I don’t get a Spin snack then I’m
going to eat the Dearest One” “And anyway,
that ghosty beasty thing in the background is probably
just Duncan with a toy out the toy basket and is about
as scary as that French idiot Claude”!!!
I reckon we’ve got the re-incarnation of Dougall
from the Magic Roundabout?
Spends her day spaced out and is so laid back its horizontal
even when out and about. That dog wouldn’t break
into a trot let alone a run even for a month’s supply
of Spin snacks in one feed. I personally think she goes
off out into our wood and eats the mushrooms……..Dude
Well he’s all about food and keeping away from the
dog next door. But the food thing is Fred’s specialty
and I’m not even going to go there with a Spin……!!
Well she would have to be in it somewhere wouldn’t
she? But I don’t think it would be for the dog coats
as would have our misfit heroine in 101 Dalmatians who
was fixated by wanting a Dalmatian coat.
skin you if you don’t get that bucket of tea to
me 8 seconds” I hear all too often – so yes
it’s my coat she wants and finds all sorts of excuses
and traps for me to fall into. But our house allows me
lots of space to run and hide and sneak about.
is even better with loads of places to go to and pretend
to do some work, or just potter around and keep out the
way of the one that wants to skin me alive.
Spins are safe enough because Cruella has ‘turned’
and is the anti humanoid now………
“More machine now than man” “Evil and
twisted” – OB1 Kinobe
in the case of The Dearest One ‘OB1 Can’ardly’
that will go down well!!!!
so it’s red carpet night and the stars are out,
the fans are behind the barriers, TV crews, the press,
interviewers and lots of glamour and glitz……and
that’s just for The Dearest One coming back from
shopping……………for the dogs!!
first limo pulls up, the door is opened by a Rottweiler
and out steps – Mia!!
crowd go wild, there’s a lots of pushing and shoving
as the crowd wants to see close up the Boss of the Spins,
The Director, The General, The CEO of our house. With
all the regent and dignity of a known star – sorry
– Superstar, Mia takes a slow and “Oh God,
more riff raff” saunter down the red carpet.
is Duncan, he leaps out of the car and bounds around like
he’s overdosed on steroids, he bounds over to the
adoring crowds where he takes the kisses and the hugs
from his adoring fans. Duncan welcomes the treats and
jumps up and down like Zebedee – who is also on
mushrooms – no sorry – steroids. Eventually,
Duncan gets to the end of the red carpet, finds a corner
and settles down for the night. The steroids have worn
and look who’s here – Freya
are cheers and roars of approval as Freya steps out of
the car wearing a Versace coat in a mixed two tone brown.
With her long legs and slender body the boys are salivating
to get a better look at this perfection on legs. Freya
has a loyal and loving fan base having already starred
at many shows and even at her young age has already won
an Academy award for best actress at this year’s
Crufts. Such elegance as she struts down the red carpet
- and falls over Duncan
to arrive is Kallie – the car pulls up and the door
is opened – and
asleep on the back seat
several agonizing minutes and the crowd impatient, she
finally gets out of the car. It’s a lazy walk and
Kallie is unfazed by all the glitz and glamour, the flashing
of the camera’s and the noise. She takes a VERY
slow walk down the red carpet – yawning along the
way – she’s asleep by the time she gets to
the end of it
car pulls up and its Unica – She immediately jumps
out wearing a lovely white gown by Chanel - surely not?
A French gown for an Italian superstar
wastes no time and is off down the red carpet sniffing
the air and the ground, she is on the hunt, but where
will the trail lead? She gets a scent and she’s
man in the third row has a beef burger – a McDs
I think, and Unica’s on it in a flash. He stood
caught another scent? Oh no – it’s the lady
right at the back sharing a KFC with her two children.
It’s an awful sight, it’s not pretty at all……..the
tomato sauce is splashed down Unica’s gown at the
back, the kids laugh as she feasts on their KFC…..Mom
is not so pleased though and scurries off to get another
one……….with Unica behind her.
never made the red carpet that night
afterwards and giving the crowd time to catch their breath
another car slowly pulls into view, it makes a slow stop
at the side of the red carpet and the crowd are intense
– it’s started to rain – no it hasn’t
– that was just a joke. Get it? the crowd are intense
because it’s started to rain – oh just forget
and look at this…….no one can make an entrance
like ‘he’ can. Mr Muscles himself. The Arnie
of the Spin world, the Bruce Willis of dogs…….JJ
Spinone oh oh 7 himself
has a Hugo Boss suit in white and orange, it’s a
tight fit and you can see his muscle tone. The girls feint,
some are in tears, others just aghast at the Chill off
the hill, after all, this is one chilled out superdog.
Even the men in the crowd have gone green – either
with envy or the tuna was off in the sandwiches. Shock
horror – some of the men have also feinted. JJ has
this affect you know.
noise is deafening, the camera flashes light up the night
sky, TV presenters and interviewers rush forward to get
close to ‘The Main man’
for JJ it’s all too much??
not for this kind of publicity and he jumps straight back
into the car and onto The Dearest Ones lap.
A screech of tyres and he’s gone
to arrive is Savvy…..Savanna
car slows to a halt and Savvy steps out - and stretches……..wearing
a lovely Burberry white and orange coat the crowd gasp
in awe at the stately Savanna. She looks around as to
where the food source might be. The crowds cheer and shout
her name as Savvy also won an Academy award earlier this
year for her role in “Crufts – The final Frontier”
in which she played best supporting actress to Freya in
the same film.
is used to the fuss and the potential treats she might
get and is therefore happy to meet and greet the fans,
Savvy also stops to sign autographs in the vain belief
it will lead to a treat. It doesn’t and she wanders
off down the red carpet…….
on – who’s this?????
can’t be……….but it is
car pulls up slowly, this car is much smaller than the
Limos previously pouring out Spinone’s on their
big night out.
looks like a small French car……..an old Citroën
2CV if I’m not mistaken
it the Pink Panther?
fourth musketeer perhaps?
it a lost legionnaire?
good grief it’s Monsieur Je t’aime himself
et Madame’s eet ees Claude Barbet
crowd boo and hiss in a most hostile manner
is a Spin night and here is that French lunatic to ruin
the end of the Red Carpet are a few Spins all lined up
and laughing out loud with a particularly large ‘howl’
of laughter from JJ……….the joke is on
Claude Barbet who by now is looking all rather sheepish
in a Barbet kind of way?
later we discover that the Spins told Claude to turn up
for his big night out on the town and to receive the applause
from his adoring fans for being the first Frenchman allowed
into what has famously become known as Little Italy.
is not amused
for the Spins it is a night they will never forget.
for your Spin it will be too? Have a think about where
your Spin fits into Hollywood – I have – and
concluded it’s the Car Park!!
care out there and don’t get cold………