The Visitors and The Visiting

Bonjours again peeps

Oui it’s me again – Claude. Claude Barbet – remember? Oh come I’m not that forgettable!!
French and Gorgeous ring a bell with anyone out there??

Oh him…….Wow, and so soon I hear you say……well peeps you never get fed up with all the good things in life and of course I am one of them. Claude Barbet…….Life in a good thing!!!

And for these adventures I want to tell you about a recent visit we had to the house on the hill and also about a visit we all went on…….Claude went partying!!!! (And stayed sober)

Ma mere (my mother) came to visit me…….oh whoopee doo!!!

Nag nag nag!!!

“Oh Claude are they feeding you enough”?

“Do you get enough exercise”?

“Are the humans kind to you”?

“And how are those nasty Italians treating you, my little odd coloured son”?

“And just exactly how did you end up looking like that”?

“You look like a two tone mop”

“But you are a handsome young pup and one day you’ll grow up big and strong and have all the girls after you”

And and and and and - Oh God she went on for ages and I fell asleep with all her rhetoric about life down south and living with the Spins where she was and the food and the walks and the training and so on…………..Mothers.....!!! What can you do eh?

“Well I only want what’s best for my little brown and white fruit bon bon”

That did it!!! She sounded like The Dearest One………where’s the door, I’m off out………

And the following day we were all off out and down to the river then along the beach. Time to ‘bond’ with mommy!!!!!

Freya came with us because she can!! And Freya bought her friend along as well, Angel!!

Angel?…….Angel?…..just how the hell do you name a Spin Angel? Angelic they most definitely are not!! (Says Mr Perfect from France) that’s like calling me flat coated….
Angel had come with my Mom to be a companion for the weekend and also to represent the family they live with down south. Angels a Spin, as if I could do with another one in the house

The Dearest One had a friend to take with her as well - but not on a lead!!

I know I know, it took me by surprise as well?? I didn’t know she had a friend either!! I reckoned money changed hands there so she could say “Look everyone, I have a friend” “And it doesn’t involve four legs and an appetite like a pack of wolves”

But does consume wine as we both do……..hic, slurred “Come on kidsh itsh dinner time” or

“You let the dogsh out and I’ll open another bottle of Chateau Neuf De Pape circa 1956”

“Or would you prefer thish fruity little red from Morrishonsh”??

Anyway, the following day we were all off down to the beach……no time for crabbing though!!

The four of us hunted high and low for the elusive wet stuff that you lot call the sea and being keen with our noses we all followed Angel? Up a bloody hill and in the opposite direction!! Me and Freya stayed at the back letting those idiots realise they’re silly mistake!!

But once they realised that the sea is the big pondy type thing behind them we were off like……well, like jolly fast things really

Oh what joy we had splashing about and frolicking in the waves…….such bliss - he says sarcastically

I wanted to have a word with my Mom about the Dearest One and see if she had any tips for me on how to control her

I finally got her up on the beach and away from the other two loonies….

We had a chat about food and exercise and toys and rest and play and how I took on Rico at digging holes and how Freya was a mate and was jolly naughty and was teaching me all the wrong things, mom was not happy as she knew how I felt as she had the same issues back at her house. It was then I went on to tell her about my gun dog training, mainly to change the subject.

And most importantly about The Dearest One and her weird ways?

Remember them?? Well you would if you’d read about my gun dog training in my School days section…Oh come on keep up

I specifically asked her how I could stop The Dearest One from teaching me to March when she got into Sergeant Major mode

I demonstrated – “By the left, quick march” - “And Left, left, left right left……”

My Mother found it most amusing and suggested I did one of two things?

1. Continue to be trained as a gun dog – then shoot her, or
2. Drag her into the sea – now – and drown her

I then asked my mom if I did either one of those, then who would feed me?

Good point Claude, she said

Let us hope then that the Colonel can teach her the ways of the human without the military four step approach

After a while we all headed off towards the river which at this time of the year is a gently babbling BIG stream, not deep, but enough to drink from and have a hoot up and around and into the woods at the back of the beach…….we all had some fun in there and this was where I first learned to get out of my depth!! But back then, it wasn’t a babbling BIG stream – it was a bloody torrent of water. I was lucky not to have been swept out to sea……..but being French and gorgeous and an outright hero I persevered and got through to the other side much to the disappointment of the Spins gloating on the other side. Claude will have his day……….

Well, after all that we headed off back home for tea and scones and strawberry jam……Not

But we were fed well and with ‘them two’ back on the bottle all us dogs were left to rest. Which was good because we were off to a party the next day………

It’s party time……….

Claude has not been to a party before and so Claude was looking forward to this??

Or so I thought!!

However, it wasn’t until we got there that I discovered that The Devious One had failed to tell me just one little minor detail??

Oh pray tell Claude, what would that be?


Talk about little Sicily…… I’ve not been to Sicily but I’ve heard of its reputation and who its home to and Sacre Bleu peeps here I was with my mom at an all Italian affair.

Need to poo moment…..

My Mom came looking for me and we were both surprised that we were still French and still walking!!

I tried to find Duncan in amongst the gangs from Italy but it was hopeless, I saw him with his head buried in a large food bag…..or a rubbish bag with food in it. Useless animal!! I took some refuge in the food that was easily available and that for the time being we were being left alone.

But how long before they realised and took us for French spies……

Oh how the imagination runs……

My Mom went off to find her owner, fortunately she was sober and mom and her had a chat…

The Dearest One (I’m glad to say was also sober) but was busily dragging Duncan from the rubbish bag….

And as for me??

Well as it turned out I found a load of toys and bits of food to play with and or eat, my theory by now was twofold, if I couldn’t eat it then by implication I could play with it. And so I did – both

The weather was great, the Spins never really knew we were there and overall me and mom had a great time. Yes peeps I have to admit it was an excellent party and enjoyed by all – ish?

Duncan was a bit disappointed that he couldn’t get to take home his doggy bag!!

And Angel?? I don’t know but mom reckons she’s ok…….woman thing I suspect

And in my acknowledgements I want to say a special thanks – in fact a BIG Thank you to:

- Babs and Mark and their assistant organisers for a great party – you know who you are!!

- Annette for bringing my Mom to come and see me……it was great not to be the only Frenchy in amongst all those Italians

- The weather which was superb

- To everyone who gave me food!!

- To the raffle ticket and a very useful Carpet cleaner!!
That will save The Banker from getting on his hands and knees to clean the carpet!!

And so to bed!!

I went round all the house? I checked the kitchen, the living room and when I was going up the stairs the Dearest One stopped me and asked me what I was doing and where I was going??

Au revoir peeps and see you soon – I hope!!!

Botty burping moment……..

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