Visitors and The Visiting
it’s me again – Claude. Claude Barbet –
remember? Oh come I’m not that forgettable!!
French and Gorgeous ring a bell with anyone out there??
him…….Wow, and so soon I hear you say……well
peeps you never get fed up with all the good things in
life and of course I am one of them. Claude Barbet…….Life
in a good thing!!!
for these adventures I want to tell you about a recent
visit we had to the house on the hill and also about a
visit we all went on…….Claude went partying!!!!
(And stayed sober)
mere (my mother) came to visit me…….oh whoopee
Claude are they feeding you enough”?
you get enough exercise”?
the humans kind to you”?
how are those nasty Italians treating you, my little odd
just exactly how did you end up looking like that”?
look like a two tone mop”
you are a handsome young pup and one day you’ll
grow up big and strong and have all the girls after you”
and and and and - Oh God she went on for ages and I fell
asleep with all her rhetoric about life down south and
living with the Spins where she was and the food and the
walks and the training and so on…………..Mothers.....!!!
What can you do eh?
I only want what’s best for my little brown and
white fruit bon bon”
did it!!! She sounded like The Dearest One………where’s
the door, I’m off out………
the following day we were all off out and down to the
river then along the beach. Time to ‘bond’
came with us because she can!! And Freya bought her friend
along as well, Angel!!
how the hell do you name a Spin Angel? Angelic they most
definitely are not!! (Says Mr Perfect from France) that’s
like calling me flat coated….
Angel had come with my Mom to be a companion for the weekend
and also to represent the family they live with down south.
Angels a Spin, as if I could do with another one in the
Dearest One had a friend to take with her as well - but
not on a lead!!
know I know, it took me by surprise as well?? I didn’t
know she had a friend either!! I reckoned money changed
hands there so she could say “Look everyone, I have
a friend” “And it doesn’t involve four
legs and an appetite like a pack of wolves”
does consume wine as we both do……..hic, slurred
“Come on kidsh itsh dinner time” or
let the dogsh out and I’ll open another bottle of
Chateau Neuf De Pape circa 1956”
would you prefer thish fruity little red from Morrishonsh”??
the following day we were all off down to the beach……no
time for crabbing though!!
four of us hunted high and low for the elusive wet stuff
that you lot call the sea and being keen with our noses
we all followed Angel? Up a bloody hill and in the opposite
direction!! Me and Freya stayed at the back letting those
idiots realise they’re silly mistake!!
But once they realised that the sea is the big pondy type
thing behind them we were off like……well,
like jolly fast things really
what joy we had splashing about and frolicking in the
waves…….such bliss - he says sarcastically
wanted to have a word with my Mom about the Dearest One
and see if she had any tips for me on how to control her
finally got her up on the beach and away from the other
had a chat about food and exercise and toys and rest and
play and how I took on Rico at digging holes and how Freya
was a mate and was jolly naughty and was teaching me all
the wrong things, mom was not happy as she knew how I
felt as she had the same issues back at her house. It
was then I went on to tell her about my gun dog training,
mainly to change the subject.
most importantly about The Dearest One and her weird ways?
them?? Well you would if you’d read about my gun
dog training in my School days section…Oh come on
specifically asked her how I could stop The Dearest One
from teaching me to March when she got into Sergeant Major
I demonstrated – “By the left, quick march”
- “And Left, left, left right left……”
Mother found it most amusing and suggested I did one of
Continue to be trained as a gun dog – then shoot
2. Drag her into the sea – now – and drown
then asked my mom if I did either one of those, then who
would feed me?
point Claude, she said
us hope then that the Colonel can teach her the ways of
the human without the military four step approach
a while we all headed off towards the river which at this
time of the year is a gently babbling BIG stream, not
deep, but enough to drink from and have a hoot up and
around and into the woods at the back of the beach…….we
all had some fun in there and this was where I first learned
to get out of my depth!! But back then, it wasn’t
a babbling BIG stream – it was a bloody torrent
of water. I was lucky not to have been swept out to sea……..but
being French and gorgeous and an outright hero I persevered
and got through to the other side much to the disappointment
of the Spins gloating on the other side. Claude will have
after all that we headed off back home for tea and scones
and strawberry jam……Not
we were fed well and with ‘them two’ back
on the bottle all us dogs were left to rest. Which was
good because we were off to a party the next day………
has not been to a party before and so Claude was looking
forward to this??
so I thought!!
it wasn’t until we got there that I discovered that
The Devious One had failed to tell me just one little
pray tell Claude, what would that be?
WAS A SPINONE PARTY
about little Sicily……..now I’ve not
been to Sicily but I’ve heard of its reputation
and who its home to and Sacre Bleu peeps here I was with
my mom at an all Italian affair.
to poo moment…..
Mom came looking for me and we were both surprised that
we were still French and still walking!!
tried to find Duncan in amongst the gangs from Italy but
it was hopeless, I saw him with his head buried in a large
food bag…..or a rubbish bag with food in it. Useless
animal!! I took some refuge in the food that was easily
available and that for the time being we were being left
how long before they realised and took us for French spies……
how the imagination runs……
Mom went off to find her owner, fortunately she was sober
and mom and her had a chat…
The Dearest One (I’m glad to say was also sober)
but was busily dragging Duncan from the rubbish bag….
as for me??
as it turned out I found a load of toys and bits of food
to play with and or eat, my theory by now was twofold,
if I couldn’t eat it then by implication I could
play with it. And so I did – both
weather was great, the Spins never really knew we were
there and overall me and mom had a great time. Yes peeps
I have to admit it was an excellent party and enjoyed
by all – ish?
was a bit disappointed that he couldn’t get to take
home his doggy bag!!
Angel?? I don’t know but mom reckons she’s
ok…….woman thing I suspect
in my acknowledgements I want to say a special thanks
– in fact a BIG Thank you to:
Babs and Mark and their assistant organisers for a great
party – you know who you are!!
Annette for bringing my Mom to come and see me……it
was great not to be the only Frenchy in amongst all those
The weather which was superb
To everyone who gave me food!!
To the raffle ticket and a very useful Carpet cleaner!!
That will save The Banker from getting on his hands and
knees to clean the carpet!!
so to bed!!
went round all the house? I checked the kitchen, the living
room and when I was going up the stairs the Dearest One
stopped me and asked me what I was doing and where I was
Au revoir peeps and see you soon – I hope!!!