yes I’m fine and well and growing up, as you do.
The gorgeousness of being French grows with me every day
and it is something those Italians can only look in envy
well fed and watered and for these adventures –
which they were, brings me neatly to the theme of this
chapter. Food and water
But first peeps – there’s this?
was sat contemplating life, the universe and the English
language the other day and taking time out to reflect……now
as I’ve no idea what I’m talking about or
at the moment even thinking about, I heard the dulcid
tones of the Dreariest One in the background. “Where’s
my leetle President Hollande then”?
I tell you peeps, they ought to bring back the guillotine
for that woman……..sometimes…….just
sometimes she really does push it.
– me and some of the Spins were going out?
this should be a laugh I thought to myself as I prepared
to go into the standard ‘I’m French and gorgeous’
mode – whilst the Italians just looked the same??
A mixture of fashion and hurricane Katrina in the same
room. How on urf those things win shows is completely
beyond me….just wait till they see me?? Oh yea Baby……………
be playing ‘La Marseillaise’ when I strut
my stuff in the ring
where was I – oh yes, my ego. But that’s another
the Dreariest One did a roll call of who was going and
of course my name was first!! The door was opened and
“Aarrgghh……what the hell is this thing”?
in its place was this cherry coloured thing. I looked
at the Spins (and that’s rare enough) they looked
at me (even rarer) and between us we must have all been
thinking the same thing?
No way will we all get in there. We ran up the drive,
down the drive and into the garden and still no Landee.
We went down to the gate, no Landee
then charged back up to the house where the cherry thing
was and saw the opening into it. One by One we got in
and much to our astonishment it was massive inside. Comfortable
and certainly not what we expected.
We set off and went zooming past ‘that’ vet’s
place (didn’t see any ducks)!! On through Aberaeron
and along the coast road.
God now where are we going I thought to myself? Some of
the Spins were with me so a vet visit was out, no toys,
so a playground was out. BUT, she had brought the leads
so something was in?
turned off the main road and drove down this little lane
for what seemed like an eternity.
an eternity? Is it edible?
she stopped in the middle of nowhere sensible as far as
I could tell. She got out, came around to the back of
‘the thing’ with leads in hand and hooked
was helped down out the back because I’m French
and didn’t want to ruffle my coat as I needed to
look my best – it’s a French thing –
you wouldn’t understand, whilst the Spins just stepped
down on their own. Typical Italians you know just want
to show their legs off as they exit from ‘the thing’.
smell outside was different. It intrigued me (is there
an out trigue)? Just asking!!
we dragged the Dreariest One off down this lane towards
‘the smell’ – very atmospheric it was.
Like this story really – atmospheric – oh
come on, I’m setting the scene for you, be patient.
And onwards towards…………….
BLEU’S AND THEN SOME”
THAT IS WHAT I CALL A POND”
grief peeps, it was massive and we’re talking huge
as in bigger than a big thing that was wet”
was the pond to end all ponds and it had a little bit
of attitude……read on!!!
at this point it is worth mentioning that the Dreariest
One had wellies on!!
walked or rather dragged our lead master down this path
to what I now know is called a beach. And I now know what
the bottom of the path and ‘on the beach’
we were let off our leads and literally free to go, and
go we did.
is just the dogs’ pods…..superb. Manifique……..
and Kallie headed down to the big pond which involved
a gentle trot across some rocks. I felt like the French
explorer Jacques Cousteau….now that man had style,
was very smart and very much a big pond man – just
like Claude Barbet.
will go down in history peeps……..just you
see!!! Or sea……..clever eh…..non!!!
wasn’t long before Kallie and the great French adventurer
Claude Barbet had reached the sand – and the sea!!
Now I understood the watery bit, but when I looked out
across the pond, I saw no ships!! Sorry……..actually,
I saw nothing. This really was the ponds of ponds. At
home I get in one side and out the other. Not so sure
that is possible here
can now see why the Spin has long legs? Because for me
to go in to the sea as deep as them I would have to drown…..or
swim. But instinct and courage for Claudy poo’s
(did I just say that) knows no bounds and it wasn’t
long before I had to take the plunge!!
thought (being French and intelligent) I would show the
Spins that we French are not afraid of anything and near
to where we were was Le River!!
Dreariest One (now my hero) and back to being the Dearest
One was up by the river and so I had the ideal opportunity
to show off le courage and simply cross the river to the
Bloody hell it was cold…….
It was freezing my bits off…..
despite the agony and for the love of France I persevered
and overcame my pain to actually enjoy it…..a lot
had to dig deep but with dignity and pride and with both
the Dearest One and the Spins looking at me I stepped
forth and marched my way across that river. I had to resort
to a little swimming in the middle and despite the current
trying to pull me down and the dread of being washed out
to sea, I finally made it to the other side and the sanctuary
of discovering that I had got disorientated and ended
back up where I started and had to do it all again. Oh
how they laughed!!
Claude……but dry brain? Claude had learned
the exploits of the river I decided it was time to explore
the beach a little closer and noticed (as you do) that
it did appear to be a bit of a food source?
I like food and being French we are famous for our cuisine
– is there no end to my talent?
big pond had waves – not as gorgeous as my waves
that I’m growing of course, but nevertheless there
are waves associated to the pond. Now these are little
waves at the water’s edge and as you go further
out these waves are slightly bigger. Now most humans already
know this of course – except it seems, just one….The
Dumbest One!!!! Durrrrrrrrr
the Dumbest One had gone for a gentle “paddle”
I think you call it and in her wellies. No problem with
that you might think. And there wasn’t……until
it was time to take another photo of me. I’m French,
I’m gorgeous and just love having my picture taken.
A sort of canine Brigitte Barbot in a masculine puppy
kind of way. But strike a pose I can – and did.
Or rather was going to??
Dumbest One called me over and told me to stand in front
of her, and so I did. It was then I noticed a wave….not
a big wave, but a wave that even I knew was slightly bigger
And her wellies!!!
pointed to said wave and she ignored me, happily snapping
away at my gorgeousness, until the wave hit her.
I’m not sure what language she used because I was
not familiar with it, but she did not appear to be amused.
I was, and had to clear off before I laughed my paws off.
to the food source…..come on come on, it’s
not that difficult – keep up
I had gone off to explore a potential food source and
the Dumbest One had gone off to sit on the rocks and empty
her wellies, I ventured down to the sea where it was just
coming ashore (God my Eeenglish improves with every passing
suddenly I came across this slimy slippery stuff……later
on the Drying out one told me it was sea weed and I said
“I saw it first and its mine”
forget it – I thought you might appreciate a funny
comment as this has been such a traumatic read for you
all, what with me going backwards in the river and pointing
out mini tsunami’s to the drying out one.
never bothered with the sea weed as it wasn’t really
what I fancied for supper…..and so off I went in
search of something more edible and filling.
had this brain wave (That’s like a sea wave only
its mine) that if I had a dig round in the sand and maybe
venture into the sea a little I might be able to find
a little morsel of food. Well you never know do you……it’s
a sort of rock pooling for doggies!!
went in between the rock pools, the river and the beach
as I thought this was an area that could well produce
some form of success. Instinct didn’t come into
it and neither did smell. Well ok then, you try sniffing
with your nose under the water!! Go on I dare you……
persevered and felt lucky as I guess we were all having
a great runnies out – hey and I forgot to mention??
legs…….work a treat. Brilliant and rah rah
to the vet for that jab!!! But if I only had one jab and
my legs appeared what the hell did the Spins have?? Mr.
Franken Spinstein – Veterinary Surgeon extraordinaire!!
hang on a minute? They’ve had cosmetic surgery haven’t
they? Those legs are implants aren’t they??
forgot what I was on about now……oh yea…my
yea I know it’s not French but it fits this bit…..
just wasn’t his day was it? I mean there he was
all sideways walk and showing off his big claws and who
comes along to ruin his day?
got it – Claude Barbet.
tonight I’m having crab with garlic and herb sauce
served with a little white wine…..yummy
yes, I got me a crab………
1 – Claws 0
that’s it for these adventures and I’m sure
you’ll agree they really were some adventures.
all had a great time except the drying out one…..!!
before we got our leads put back on I took one last look
at the beach, the big pond and the river in the distance,
I was tired and hungry but had my crab supper to look
forward to. The wellies would soon dry out and so would
I. And peeps I learned later on that all this is to get
me used to the water? I’m going gun dog training
soon and will of course let you know how I get on!!
today, duck tomorrow……..bring it on
That’s it from me for this time…….
yes……’The thing’? It’s really
good and is called a Subaru. A new word for me and a new
adventure every time we go out in it…..so I guess
it’s also Au revoir le Landee and Bonjours all round
to the Subaru!!
revoir and take care out there