I was in the kitchen one evening around dinner time……..not mine but the dogs, when the Dearest One came sauntering in and announced the following:
“You are to make me a cup of tea with all haste” “I am going to feed the dogs now”

I struggled correlating ‘me making a cup of tea’ with the all powerful one feeding the dogs. I could not work out how the two were combined…………however, the one thing that was not to be argued with or questioned was that the mighty one had spoken and commanded.

And so it was to be…………tea for her greatness and dinner for the dogs.

As the kettle mercilessly tortured the water inside until it gave up any hope and boiled, and in between times I had delicately placed a tea bag in the mighty one’s 4 litre tea mug (no sugar) and watched intently as she went about the dog feeding session.

7 Spins, 2 Springers and Viz in a pear tree……….

So that’s 10 bowls to prepare. Now this should be interesting I thought!!!!

The dogs, until then reasonably calm, and upon hearing the rattle of their bowls were of course now on high alert and as usual were very excited.
You would think they were half starved to death and had just seen the UNICEF truck in the distance bringing in food supplies………
God, it was chaos

I poured the water into the mug (4 litres takes a bit of time) and continued my observations. It then occurred to me that not all the dogs would get the same and that some sort of process now ensued to ensure each dog got the right food. Then of course it was a case of putting a bowl down to the dog in question without another one leaping into the bowl to devour it before it hit the ground.

I added the correct 27.5 centilitres of milk to the tea to whiten it within a shade of the color chart I had been provided with indicating a ‘good mug of tea’.

“Tea’s up” I proudly announced

“Leave it on the top, I’m feeding the dogs”

Despair set in. Now I would be accused of letting her tea go cold…………oh well, life’s a female dog I guess!!!!!!!

I continued to watch the frenzy of dog feeding.
The mightiest mighty one took all 10 bowls and went to the dog food storage area, where she proceeded to place certain amounts in measure of a dog biscuit thing stuff into each bowl.
To do this she used a plastic cup already supplied.

Cup full’s for the Spins only adjusting for the pup, and the remainder?

- The old Springer Max was I learned, on a diet – he got 4 of these biscuit things in his bowl

- The younger Springer – Max!! got 5

- The Viz got 27

I enquired why the younger Springer got one more biscuit than the old Springer? “Because anymore and he acts like he’s on steroids and bounces all over the place”

“So why has the Viz got 27 then”? I further enquired, “well when he goes out he imagines he’s a JCB so he needs lots of energy to excavate with”

“But old Max will die if you don’t give him more than 4 of those biscuits” “they’re only the size of a 5 pence piece” “You’ll get reported for cruelty” I said

The mightiest mighty one glared at me……….

“Just look at him she said, when he lays down you could mistake him for a small walrus with fur” “and when he walks those legs only just meet the ground his body is so big”
“Anything other than level ground and he would rock himself to sleep trying to move again”
“He looks like a four legged caterpillar”

“Mmm……you’re right”, I had to admit.

Old Max is – well, he’s old. He reminds me of an old man sat in a chair with pipe and slippers and the Daily Telegraph. Only gets up and about when he has to, he’s been there and done it, now he just enjoys the time to relax and reflect.

And now back to the serious stuff……

Back in the kitchen the dog’s bowls were arranged on the kitchen top in order of seating where the dogs ate.

“They all know their place” the mightiest mighty one explained

I watched as various amounts of additional supplementary food was added and mixed in with the biscuits. Every day different, pilchards, lamb, rabbit, beef and so on. Each bowl carefully being prepared.

After a while they were ready and of course so were the dogs, except old Max? He knew what was coming – or rather wasn’t coming!!!!

And so the feeding frenzy began, and I could not believe my eyes. Each dog settled into or very near its feeding position in relation to where the bowl would be placed. Routine…..
Then as the bowls got placed the frenzied attack into them began…..after a minute or two there was calm. Until that is one of them finished and then another. There then took place a rather curious set of events where each finishing dog went on the trail around the place to see if those still eating had ‘dropped’ a morsel or two. The silence then being interrupted by small growls and moans and a sort of “Buggar off” type of growl as the marauders went searching.
Not all the dogs of course can be sitting in the same room, the pup is isolated for now for obvious reasons.

A couple of the Spins eat separately because they eat slowly and therefore are vulnerable to their bowls being raided when their heads were turned. We don’t have food aggression as this was trained out of them at an early age, it has to be otherwise chaos ensues.

So with them all fed and the mightiest mighty one now in the front room on the couch, feet up, and sipping a warm bucket of tea whilst flicking through 38,239 channels on the idiot box (TV) all is calm.

No it isn’t?

“Boy” the mightiest mighty one bellowed at me through the walls

“Let the dogs out after they have eaten and follow them with the pooper scooper”

“But your greatness” “I can’t possibly follow 10 dogs all at once and hover round them waiting for them to stoop can I”?

“You idiot”

“Just go out with them and get up what you can and where you see them”

Oh bloody hell, I thought watching all 10 dogs disperse all over the place……..the first one was easy to find?

It was on the bottom of my boot!!!!

I came back to the house around 10pm just as the light was going…….it had been a long evening in the hunt for the elusive poo. I had met with some success but I do admit that some of it was potentially a day or two old. I couldn’t find all the more recent droppings……..

I went inside to the living room and proudly presented the pooper scooper to she that must be obeyed. I was well pleased with myself……..

“You !@#$%^&* idiot, get that out of here” (Censored)

“But look scariest one” “I have succeeded in improving the land and scooped where no man has scooped before. I have had an environmental impact to the positive…..”
“Yes but it’s to the negative in here you lunatic” “Now #$%&&%* away and dispose of it in the appropriate place” (Reworded for everyone’s sake)!!!!

And so off I trotted to dispose of my fine hunting trophies……..

The following day I had reflected on the feeding process and decided that I would ask the fabulous one if I could feed the dogs!!!!!

Even now, I have no idea what possessed me to ask such a stupid thing!! But she said “Yes of course you can”

I know what you’re thinking……….!!!!!!

That evening around dinner time I took possession of the 10 bowls. I was then briefed by the mightiest mighty one on each bowls contents and who has what.

8 seconds later, I had forgotten……….

Clearly this was not going to be as easy as I thought and was now regretting that I had asked if I could feed the dogs.

By now, even I needed the pooper scooper!!!!

I took the 10 bowls – easy

Went to the food room and placed 4 biscuits in a bowl, 5 in another, 27 in another and cup full of each in 6 others with the puppy getting the puppy stuff (I don’t know what it’s called – it’s just puppy stuff)

That was also easy

Getting back through 10 excited and of course, near to death from starvation dogs was another issue. I got there……but I couldn’t remember how the fabulous one had took that walk without injury to herself or a dog or without dropping a bowl or two.

But I am resilient and made it to the next stage – but that was not so easy

Now here’s where it went just slightly awry!!!! Just slightly

You see, I couldn’t remember who had what and in what amounts!!!

And JJ has this much, Kallie that much and this gets a pilchard and that gets the lamb cooked in a red wine sauce with cranberry juice gravy…….no sorry – forget that last bit

Eventually on bowl 8 I was out of ideas and had also lost the plot as to whose bowl was whose

Definitely not easy!!!!!!!

I gave up and felt with the knowledge I had it all looked very fair. The bowls went down without too much trouble as the Sea of Dogs parted easily for me to put the bowls down for them.

Old Max thought it was Christmas – and the following day rocked himself to sleep after trying to get up from pooing

Young Max didn’t so much run round the following day as run, jump, spring and generally charge about like one those Duracell rabbits – all I had to do was wait for his batteries to run out

The Viz? Well he dug his way into the adjacent field and came back that night with his front leg muscles the size of marrows…….but he looked well pleased himself

The pup? Fed like a big dog. Acted like one as well afterwards and when her batteries had finally ran out she slept and rested for 3 days afterwards

The 6 ‘other’ Spins, have formally signed a petition to the Dearest One asking that I feed them twice a day every day!!!!!!

The Banker? In hiding at a safe house and looking to be re-homed – I haven’t eaten for 3 days as I dare not go back to the house until, or unless the maddest one calms down (or I get re-homed)
Incidentally, I am house trained and can make a cup of tea. I am clean and tidy and can do various odd jobs. Good with animals!!!!!! (That’s what got me in this mess) oh yes – and I will require feeding on a daily basis!! But not out of a bowl……..

This dog food thing is actually very interesting??

The varieties, the manufacturers, tins, bags, treat packets……….the list is endless. Some of it ludicrously expensive, some of it more sensible

We have Farmers Co-ops near to us and they sell all sorts as well for all dog types……
We bought a working dog mix – once – because our dogs have the luxury of plenty of room to run around. But the working mix only achieved one thing?? It gave each of them a turbocharger set on high boost………they never ran out of energy and if they didn’t burn it off then it turned to fat………Where’s Old Max??

So a balance is required.

Add into the mix that some feeds don’t suit the dogs

Some too rich, some too unattractive to their nose and taste

Some too boring they just don’t bother with it

Some too good to be true and can’t get enough of it

Some that gives them the runs – and we’re not talking round the fields runs either

And some that is just right

I used to think and indeed was told once (or twice) that a dog would eat anything? Well it doesn’t – and some dogs are actually fussy about what they eat

If a dog is used to a constant sharing of human food and its own then anything below that standard it picks at or rejects

We use occasional moments to give them left-overs, or if we’ve made too much gravy we share that in their bowls. But we do not deliberately over ingredient our meals to give the remainder to them.

We will cook rice of course for them along with chicken – especially if we have one with a sensitive stomach or has been off its food – that combination is ideal for us as well!!! It’s a great and virtually harmless builder if you’ve been poorly!!! Honestly………

Well of course you’ve learned nothing from this particular guide to feeding your Spinone, and why is that you may ask??

Because we’re all different and so are our dogs, we all have differing tastes and so do they.

And of course not all the dogs are worked in the same way…….

Some do work as they and nature intended

Others are pets

Others are pets and show dogs

Whilst some are pets with a lot of room to play and go on long walkies

The food is down to taste and how the dog is perceived in the family circle

Alfie, who is Freya’s brother out of our litter went to a working family where his skills, will over time, be honed to HPR – just as nature intended. But his diet will of course vary as to his working week and indeed a real treat for a dog in that situation is a nice cooked rabbit (Obviously skin it and gut it first – then boil it and allow to simmer, at this point add two oxo cubes and cook until the meat is cooked through) serve to Alfie with a few biscuits to help digestion and break up the meat when he chews.

Note: Once he’s had a taste of that little lot, he will pick up empty cartridge shells, put them in the waste bag you have with you. Then he will not just point and flush that rabbit for you afterwards, but measure the wind direction, give advice on the lead you need for a clean kill and further he will also flush the pigeon in the tree near you towards your direction for that nice overhead shot, with the second barrel!!

That’s also a potentially easy watch and pick up for him afterwards.

Teamwork……….Man and dog working in harmony. Priceless

However, just recently his owners had other ideas about his diet and he was allowed?? (not) to eat the ‘wind fall’ pears from the pear tree in their garden.

When I heard about this I smiled a wide smile?

Ours eat the ‘wind fall’ apples out of our garden…….until it hits the stomach – then it is rejected and comes out the rear exhaust and is deposited nicely on the grass.

But the second thing is the potential fermentation – and of course the affect on the dog.

Whilst my imagination ran wild with dogs running round in a reasonably inebriated state, the thought that Alfie might have done the same amused me a lot………but he’s so young!!!! And we all were once!!! – remember those days??

And just for the couple who have Alfie, I offer this warning!!!

“It wasn’t the apple on the tree that caused the trouble, it was the pair underneath”!!!

OK that’s it for now and we’ll be back soon………….Bon Apetite




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